Being a photographer you are there through everything on the wedding day and can honestly say I love my job! Being so intimately involved with the couples and families on one of the most important days of their lives, is incredible, and I count myself lucky every time I photograph a wedding.
With all this behind the scenes knowledge ive seen so many different bride & bridemaids combos. From just a sister, to cousins, to the grooms best friends wives, work colleagues, school friends, the list goes on and on. One of my first questions when I meet the lovely ladies is “how do they all know each other?” and from this hear all their special stories which helps me get a better understanding of the dynamic of the group and how they all know each other, helping me get the best and happiest pictures from the day.
Personally I don’t think there is a fool proof way to choose who you want as a bridesmaid, as each bride has their own reasons for selecting who they want there on their wedding day but from being a bride myself and being around numerous brides, I feel certain aspect are super important to me and if you perhaps getting married may use them to help you make your decision, also for the bridesmaid, their role that they should play in their besties big day.
Being asked to be a bridesmaid is a really big honour and not something to be taken lightly. The bride has put a lot of thought and effort into her decision and means a lot to her that you have accepted her invitation, and with this comes a little responsibility that need to be fulfilled. Before you make your decision, of who to have by your side, put a little thought into who you think will be great and supportive on your special day. You need a team that will pull together, get along, have fun and just be there for you.
As a bridemaid, you may feel the wedding day is also important for you ( which is it is) and we understand that you also want to look and feel great, but this can be done after the bride is ready or attended too. There have been times when ive had to witness the poor bride getting into her own wedding dress while yelling for a bridesmaid to please come help. This is not ideal, and I promise you bridesmaid, that there will be time to fix your hair or lipstick once the bride is ready. Just be attentive and I promise you she will love you forever!
there for you
Choosing to get married and have people witness this momentous occasion can be super stressful, and for some reason can make the calmest girl into a jibbering wreck. Ive seen some girls pull a real jekyll and hyde and I don’t EVER judge them, as the nerves or feelings they experiencing are usually something they cant control. As a bridemaid, there will be times when you not sure what to do in this situation, or perhaps feel that the bride may be a little cray cray, but it’s at these times she needs your support even more. I know you most probably want to run a mile, but just remember it’s her nerves talking, so take a glug of your champagne , and head on over to her to hold her hand, give her a hug or make her laugh, its these moments that will make her wedding day even more memorable.
Delegate, organize and chill
Its easier said that done, but my A type personality feels this is a vital aspect to having a relaxed wedding day. I have seen some super chilled brides, who on the morning of their wedding, are still finding last minute things and for them it works, but I guess I just like to be organised and with being organized feel more relaxed. Choose ladies you know that are going to help or who are calm under pressure. Not everyone who is your bridemaid is Anna Wintour PA material so just make sure you delegate the things you need done to the right ladies and their different strengths, each are super important ( entertaining, cooking, making tea, hell…even choosing the right playlist) each have their roles. Then enjoy your day as you know that everything is under control. As a bridesmaid a simple, glass of water or fetching the bride something to eat while she has her makeup done, goes a long way. Being attentive and helpful is gold!
A forever bestie
Choose someone you know you will be friends with forever. ( ok this may be hard to predict as people and life circumstances change, but with this statement I find the girls that you have know since school, your sister – obviously, or cousins are no doubt going to be there through most of your life) Im not saying that the girl you just met at work isn the right girl to have by your side, but you will know if this girl is someone you will be friends with for forever. Its such an important day why not share it with someone who has been a vital part or going to be a vital part of your future, it makes it even more memorable knowing someone you friends with in 30 years time will still be there to reminisce about your special day
Most importantly…. Have fun
No one can deny that this day is super serious and important day but by all means you need to enjoy every second of it as it goes by in the blink of an eye. So when choosing the girl/girls you want to share this day with make sure the ladies you choose will be there supporting and laughing with you throughout the day.
Having fun is what its all about and getting to share these amazing moments with the people you love the most
My bride tribe on my wedding day…. oh how I do love them